8 Tips For Writing Your Own Wedding Vows

by Al's Formal Wear

January 11, 2016

While many couples decide to say traditional wedding vows at their ceremonies, some couples opt to write their own. (However, make sure you check with your officiant before making the decision to write your own vows.) This is a moment that you will remember forever, and that can be extremely nerve-wracking for some grooms. Here are some tips to make the writing process a little less worrisome:

  1. Ignore everyone else. Sure, you might be saying those vows in front of a room full of people, but the only person that truly matters will be standing right in front of you. 
  2. Get inspired. Take a look at some traditional vows to gain inspiration.
  3. Talk it out with your fiancée. Discuss your vows and how they will fit into your ceremony overall. How long should they be? (Less than two minutes is standard.) Should they be more funny, or more romantic?
  4. Start with ideas. Jot down notes about your relationship. Think about how you met, and how your relationship has progressed. Imagine what your life will be like once you’ve grown old together. What about your relationship do you hold close to your heart?
  5. Make promises. Vows are, after all, what you are promising to your partner. What kind of husband do you want to be for your wife?
  6. Edit. You should definitely be spending a significant amount of time on your vows, and editing is vital part of that process. Assuming you’ve written your vows far enough in advance of the wedding (you definitely should start early!), give yourself time to reflect and return to them after a day has passed.
  7. Read them aloud. While it might be awkward, reading your vows aloud will allow you to better understand how they will sound and what you will need to change before the ceremony.
  8. Be yourself. Most importantly, you need to be yourself. After all, these are your wedding vows.